Apparently photos of P-fars are more important than cycling solidarity
Dissin B. Gears? Not only does that shout hilarity, but it’s a mothaf*ckin rarity
that gril be fresher than Soap on a Rope –
straight-up Amen, and you can take that straight to the Pope

if Snob wasn’t bogged down in panty-bedecked fixies
he’d revel in the fact that he has fans in these cyclo-emcees
instead his blogspot traffic is gettin downright pornographic
if he continue to front Queen B, I’ma haveta hit his Ironic Orange Julius Bike with BlackIt

like this and like that and like this and like that
like an Uzi my Dura-Ace be goin rat a tat tat
as I climb through the gears up to fifty fo’-ten
to roll past all you suckaz all over again…

BS in the house and he rhymes like an animal
slayin fixies from Coney to DUMBO, he a regular a rap-manimal
Give him a Peugeot and he’ll TT it to Long Island
sell that sucka for ca$h, head home and buy a real brand

Almost daily he dissin single sprockets to his readers
I ain’t got a problem with those derailleur-free fools -- so long as they ain’t breeders
‘cause the last thing this world needs is a race of anemic single speeders
cloggin the tarmac with their Masi repros and Puch beaters

Brakes? Who needs ‘em? Those are for the technophile
Just slip on a pair of Campers and you can stop no problem, Flintstone style
It won’t take a nation of millions to hold back the flannel-clad peloton --
just free Conor Oberst tickets, a can of PBR, and some vintage Bennetton…